The Riddle

There was a man back in '95
Whose heart ran out of summers
But before he died, I asked him

Wait, what's the sense in life
Come over me, Come over me

He said,

"Son why you got to sing that tune
Catch a Dylan song or some eclipse of the moon
Let an angel swing and make you swoon
Then you will see... You will see."

Then he said,

"Here's a riddle for you
Find the Answer
There's a reason for the world
You and I..."

Picked up my kid from school today
Did you learn anything cause in the world today
You can't live in a castle far away
Now talk to me, come talk to me

He said,

"Dad I'm big but we're smaller than small
In the scheme of things, well we're nothing at all
Still every mother's child sings a lonely song
So play with me, come play with me"

And Hey Dad
Here's a riddle for you
Find the Answer
There's a reason for the world
You and I...

I said,

"Son for all I've told you
When you get right down to the
Reason for the world...
Who am I?"

There are secrets that we still have left to find
There have been mysteries from the beginning of time
There are answers we're not wise enough to see

He said... You looking for a clue I Love You free...

The batter swings and the summer flies
As I look into my angel's eyes
A song plays on while the moon is hiding over me
Something comes over me

I guess we're big and I guess we're small
If you think about it man you know we got it all
Cause we're all we got on this bouncing ball
And I love you free
I love you freely

Here's a riddle for you
Find the Answer
There's a reason for the world
You and I...

Memory Window Somewhere in 1993

Place : Cheras

Weird Dreams

1) The Family Squad
One famous millionaire, fell in love with a fatguy. Had to convince him that he (the fat guy) had a sex-change. Beauty contest. Dead body in van and boat. Saved by fishes

2) The Mobile Bank (Movie show)
Went to see a movie. Bought tickets at a mobile van. Thought it was a ticket booth. Bought it from a cute guy. Confusion. Came out and realized that it was a bank. Tried to get money back but cute guy turned out to be a crook.Helped by Chinese guy.

3) Going to meet Grandma
Went to see grandma in Kepong. Fond out Jenny was staying there for time-being to go to Chou's family an faster than ever.

4) The Capture of Me by The Black Slaves
While running, black slaves made a remark like "Why a pale girl running alone?" Scared. Then suddenly, alley turned dark and I was caught by an ugly looking black slave that had red bushy (spiky) hair.

5) The Making of the Queen
Put in cage. Later on was made into an important person because ruler of the black slaves were fond of me. He was like a blue and yellow soft toy (Big), like a Barney dinosaur.

6) The Return
Decided to return and see Grandma and see how Jenny and my so-called bf went. Sister saw me out and I was wearing a camel shirt and pants. Had an umbrella that could carry me like a parachute. The smaller I opened it, the lower it went and vice versa. Went west direction. It was raining.

Memory Window 11.30pm 6th March 2000

Place : Faro

Fiona: Well, we're still at the table, in the little restaurant, somewhere in the little town of Faro. Everybody's laughing, everybody's talking (at least Pooi Ling, Yuko, Ms Tunisia, Natasha and me)...but it's all talking and joking here...a very merry atmosphere. Now I know what it means to "eat, drink and be merry".

It's the final meal of ITC in Portugal - What am I feeling? Tired mostly; but now I feel nothing. It's like my mind's separated from my body. Though I can hear everyone talking and laughing, it feels like I'm not part of it anymore...but yet I'm thinking...

Whatsername

by Greenday

Thought I ran into you down on the street,
Then it turned out to only be a dream,
I made a point to burn all of the photographs,
She went away and then I took a different path,
I remember the face,
But I can't recall the name,
Now I wonder how whatsername has been

Seems that she disappeared without a trace,
Did she every marry old what's his face,
I made a point to burn all of the photographs,
She went away and then I took a different path,
I remember the face,
But I can't recall the name,
Now I wonder how whatsername has been

Remember, whatever,
It seems like forever ago,
Remember, whatever,
It seems like forever ago,
The regrets are useless,
In my mind,
She's in my head,
I must confess,
The regrets are useless,
In my mind,
She's in my head,
From so long ago

And in the darkest night,
If my memory serves me right,
I'll never turn back time

Forgetting you, but not the time

Yesterday's Writing Meet

I love our writing meets. Last night, a few of us met at Delicious, Bangsar Village to revive our creative juices. It has been some time since we last sat around after dinner for a round of scribbling, ruminating, reading and entertaining. Delicious was at it is, delicious.

Lud wrote about the fear of heights - a chinese man stuck on the KLCC bridge. Angeline's was a girl who lost her love but is still in denial (a 3 person perspective of the guy, the girl and the friend). Jenny's stories has a fantastical feel to it - like the picture of the snake which seemed to move in the book. Sharon's was about the fear of the years going by - aging - in the perspective of a Greek Goddess. Animah had a gem of the evening with the phrase 'flushed down the toilet of ....eternity'.

I wrote about a girl who was alone in the darkness of her friends' apartment. And the other story was a man who was losing his place at work after retiring. And finally about the friend who was a 'tick'- as in bloodsucking parasite.

And so passes another contemplative evening well-spent.

Sleep with your books

Fancy sleeping in a library? Or a library with beds in it - cream, plush walls, warm comfortable duvets, curled up with a book? *Sigh* A dream come true....New York has such a luxury - The New York Library Hotel where the floors are systematically categorized using the Dewey-Decimal system.

Thanks to such book-lovers such as Eric Forbes, we'd know more about the book-shop world.


Paris' most famous English-Language bookshop, Shakespeare & Co, located on 37, Rue de la Bucherie is also offering an opportunity to make a haven among its books. All its 91-year old charismatic owner, George Whitman, asks is,'you make your bed in the morning, help out in the shop, and read a book a day'.

Former Canadian crime-journalist; Jeremy Mercer, so inspired, wrote Books, Baguettes and Bedbugs: The Left Bank World of Shakespeare & Co. (Weidenfeld & Nicolson, November 10, 2005) - a 5 month account of his life among Shakespeare & Co's books. He also lists his 10 most-loved bookshops in the world on the Guardian.

Scared to drive

Now I know what it's like to have a phobia of driving. Motorcycles scare me the most.

The Lion, The Witch and The Wardobe

This is the Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe I remember - the 1979 animated production by Bill Melendez. I think I was 5 or 6 at that time. My mother only let me watch it during the holidays but it was one of my favourite animated movies (my other favourite was Disney's Cinderella). When she gave her permission, I remember my sister and I would be so happy - we'd gladly take out the VHS tape (the small black one),put it in the VCR and let the magic begin. Even after I was 7 or 8, when there was the Fox and The Hound playing in the cinemas, I would still like to watch this cartoon even though it was grainy for want of wear, and the music was turning tinny. I cried at every viewing no matter how many times I watched it.

That was many years ago - memory is misty, the animation looks amateurish now, comical in fact. But I never forgot the immense sense of magic this story gave me (I hid in the big wardrobe in the backroom a few times) Memories remain - chants of "Turkish Delight, Turkish Delight", the haunting melody of the soundtrack and the slight crush on Peter Pevensie.




Fast forward 2005, this monstrous production epic will most probably dwarf all previous movie adaptations of the book. However it would be interesting to wonder if a child of the now will experience that same magic I felt and carry it with him/her far into the future. Probably.

Wall Therapy

This morning, back and shoulders were aching after 3 hours of climbing walls in 1U. Angie and I went to Camp 5, the 'climbing gym' to play spider-man/woman.

It was a test of physical and mental endurance. I started by scrambling aimlessly on some features but discovered that I was supposed to follow the colours. Didn't know that the paths was distinguished by them. Once I got stuck on the 'pink' route and yelled at Angie when she was only trying to help me. (Haha, sorry girl). After a few climbs, I found my arms just giving way despite my attempts to force them to obey. It was great though, I can understand how people can get addicted to this stuff. You could see the 'lean', 'mean' bodies of the more experienced climbers

Teamwork was really important too - it does certainly feel different when someone points the way or cheers you on. There were times when the climber felt frustated by the belayer, or when the belayer was frustrated with the climber but it's all in the game of 'trust'. People there were really helpful and friendly including the other climbers - they would cheer you on even if they didn't know you. That was nice.

Accordingly we were in TP (toprope) stage but the guy we talked to there said we weren't even officially climbing yet. Angie and I have our own definition - being in the "BP" stage. We discovered this while Angie was bouldering using the 'yellows'. Hahah - ask me next time what this is

Ms L

Lately I have been visitng a policyholder who was willing to come to our company function to give her testimony. Ms L was a very jovial, talkative and alert person. At first I expected her to be the typical Chinese auntie - I only spoke to her on the phone once before visiting her - but life is full of surprises....She was unlike anything I expected.
Ms L apparently has travelled and lived illegally in the US for close to 8 years. After a visit to the states in the 90s, she decided that life suited her fine there and the next thing she knew, she was living and working in an American-Chinese restaurant, keeping the accounts and also occasional day-to-day tasks of the gourmet business.
Looking at her pictures, she was a definite contrast to what she is today.
Proudly showing me her pictures and explaining her experiences in the US, Europe and China, one could see that she greatly cherishes her memories of independent living which seemed like a dream of a distant past. She was quite comfortable in front of the camera and could even speak without me prompting her. You could see she was a woman who knew what she wanted. She is now in a wheelchair and hardly gets out of the house.
One of my colleagues asked if she could get emotional during the testimonial (they wanted people to get touched at the event sadistic la). I told them I doubted it - Ms L didn't seem like the type to get weepy or melodramatic.
However on my last visit ( a few days ago), I only saw the hurt in her when she told me that comparing life now and then, the thought of it was more unbearable than the rheumatic pains of her cartiledgeless joints. I believe the pain to be excruciating. It was the first time I saw her shed tears, but only briefly.
"Life is uncertain, plan your future before it happens!"- ends the video. Learning from Ms L's experiences, I feel that her life easily could have been mine - there were many parallels - working and travelling in a foreign country, making numerous friends, initiating gatherings, living life to the fullest. She didn't plan to be disabled, but she did plan on getting better. Her request (upon asking her what she needed as a gift) was an exercise bicycle to help strengthen her legs. (she rejected the offer of a new wheel chair as she didn't see herself using one in the future) All the best to you Ms L - keep that chin up!

Americanisms

I've been reading this fascinating book for our next meet called "Made in America" by Bill Bryson. Though some parts were draggy and factual, there were some genuinely brilliant moments.

The book started on a hilarious note on how the legendary Maytflower landing at Plymouth never landed at Plymouth.

Like how he describes Benjamin Franklin as a notorious lecher in his day whilst he is immortalized to this day as America's most venerated forefathers.

Or how Edison leeched off his employees' invention and claimed most of the credit for himself.

Or how most American names are a misnomers of indian, dutch, irish, french words- the most hilarious is the State of Idaho which was named by Congress just because it sounded native american.

If you're a fan of Bill Bryson's, travel writing, America, cafe americano's and lattes then why not make it to this Saturday's meeting at 12 noon, November 26th, La Bodega's Lounge.

Solaris

After reading the book I read reviews on IMDB that the movie was equally riveting. The star rating was a 6.3/10 and described as follows:

"truly mesmerized by this film's approach"

"(Steven Soderbergh) finally gets one of his cinematic experiments right"

"With a tremendous cast, beautiful production design, excellent direction, and one of the best film scores in recent years"

Contrary to all the above quotes, I guess I didn't really like Soderberhg's interpretation of the movie. The saving grace is that he (Soderbergh) didn't turn it into a 'deep space nine' remake. It was thoughtful in its own right but the 'spirit of science' which for me, the core of the story, was not emphasized here. Soderbergh chose to focus on the love story bit - moving at the pace of 'In The Mood For Love In Space' - could be torturous to go through. As someone said, it's a "You either love it or hate it" kind of movie.

Excellence

"Excellence is an art won by training and habituation. We do not act rightly because we have virtue or excellence, but we rather have those because we have acted rightly. We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act but a habit. "
- Aristotle

Opportunity

"Opportunity has a sly habit slipping in by the back door, and often it comes undisguised in the form of misfortune, or temporary defeat. Perhaps this is why so many fail to recognize opportunity"
- Napoleon Hill

Attitude

"There is little difference in people, but that little difference makes a big difference. This little difference is attitude. The big difference is whether it is positive or negative."

- Clement W. Stone

The Wild West (Jawa)

I can't believe I hardly blogged a book but I daresay i will blog Lonesome Dove if it kills me (and my LOMA 351 exam tomorrow which I haven't studied for yet). On the road from West to East Java, this was such a fitting read - travelling and roughing it out in the 'wild' country. I was torn to choose either Small Island (which i've yet to finish) to accompany me or pick up Larry McMurtry's 945 page novel. Somehow, the Hat Creek outfit story suited the occasion and I was too darn right. Yee Haw!

The pages flew by and I hardly noticed that the back end of the book was drawing near. I must thank Krishna Kumar for recommending this gripping read - I swear there were two parts of the novel where my tears blurbled (ala cowboy style) - it had of course something to do with Deets and Augustus but I won't say what. Living it in the rough, the lesson learnt was this "The best way to deal with death is to get on with it as fast as you can". Amen to that.

Surabaya November 5 (Saturday)

0930h Last Day. Bus ride to Kamal - Madura is a shanty-town - dust on the roads, dust on the shacks, dust on the laundy hanging on the road sides, dust on the fruits at the market, dust on the man resting in the shade, dust on the children running barefoot.Bengkalan (the town on the way to Kamal) is full of goats - goats in the fields, goats tied to a tree, goats riding the becak. Funnily enough, they're all white in colour.
In the van, my skin gets sticky all over -it's hot. The roads are potted, Indon heads are bobbings, small brown, 'songkoks' sway from side to side as if dancing to the beat of the dangdut playing from the radio.
1530h An Ice Cream - at last! (A&W's not McD's)
1730h Surabaya airport reminds me of the Kota kinabalu airport excluding the airport tax.

Pulau Madura/Sumenep November 4(Friday)

Pulau Madura November 3 (Thursday)

2200h Sticky, hot, finally in an air-cond room after going through a hell-ride from Kamal to Pamekasan. Harrassed by cheating bus drivers, over-friendly Indons. A kind Indon drove us for free to Hotel Putri. Arrived there but they were fully occupied. I remember the stickiness and the flies of Surabaya bus station, the 'pong' of the waiting area, a lady asking me where I was going and then asks me for money, shanty towns along the whole stretch of road and the wind blowing in my face.

Mount Bromo November 1 and 2 (Tues and Wed)

I didn't seem to write any notes in Bromo. The weather was so lovely I must've forgot.
All I remember is the majestic sight of the puffing mountain Bromo, Mount Batok cone and the horses.
I remember too the other backpackers, who had to sit in the barely workable cramped van for 5 hours. Fortunately Philippe and I didn't take this van.
The sleepy dorms of Cemara Indah -and the sleepy town along the road down (which was a challenge to walk up again)